4 Days

Is there something about me that just makes people want to make fun of/joke/trick me?? It's kinda interesting how even when you leave high school and start fresh in college with brand new people, they still treat you the same way your high school friends treat you. It's not necessarily a bad thing, but I guess your personality never really leaves you. Idk maybe it's just me? Not that I really mind people making fun of me or anything, but I just thought that was rather interesting.

So I'm sure everyone's heard of Natasha Richardson's incident and I've never felt so loved. I've probably had more than ten people tell me that I should not go snowboarding, not go biking, basically not do anything stupid that can end up in me killing myself. This makes me sound totally extreme, but I honestly am not. I'm actually quite afraid of doing a lot of things, but then sometimes I just end up doing it anyways for reasons I cannot explain. When I think back on those "stupid" things that I do, I always tell myself that I shouldn't do it anymore, but for some reason I never learn. I feel like I have those devil and angel imaginary conscience things that's trying to get my brain to listen to one another, but I always go with what the devil is saying haha. I know what I SHOULD do or what's "right", but I just don't do it. I guess it's my fault if I die before I'm even thirty, but you only live life once so might as well do everything you can while you're still young.

I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing that I'm eating like a crazy person now. I kinda miss my one meal a day routine, but this whole eating like a barbarian thing is rather exciting. Not exciting in terms of all the poundage I'm most likely gaining, but exciting in terms of wow I never knew my stomach can handle so much! You would think since I'm eating more that I would excrete more but NO...I seriously think I have problems either that or maybe everything is coming out of my pee cuz I seriously pee A LOT. But then again, at the rate I'm eating, and at the rate I'm not pooing, I'm surprised I'm not like obese or something...at least not yet. Yes, I know everyone just loves hearing about my digestion problems or should I say indigestion problems.

I'm sooooo glad spring break is finally here, but it's going by soooo fast!!! I hate the thought of going back to school just to know that I'm probably going to fail some more classes.

I started this post on 3/20/09 at 2:59AM and I've been adding to it every night before I go to sleep since then, but I guess yesterday's didn't save and I forgot what I said...oh well

P.S. I want to read a book